Hey, you! Yeah, you with the arms like stringbeans, the bobbing Adam's apple, the braces on your teeth, the zit that sits like a ruby in the middle of your forehead. Can't play sports, can't play football, can't get the pretty girls, can you? Those guys at City High, they've got the winning team, they've got the beefy guys, they've got the chicks. But you've got something up your sleeve besides a noticeable lack of muscle. You've got your GILBERT SCIENCE SETS! This swell comic book, A. C. GILBERT PRESENTS "SCIENCE LEADS THE WAY!" came with your kits. It told you how to beat those tough guys at City High...with your brains, using your GILBERT SCIENCE SETS.
And guess what? Because of those terrific GILBERT SCIENCE SETS, you beat those bad boys at City High! At least in the science competition, you did. As revenge they came back the next time you played football and waxed your scrawny asses!
Your revenge has had to wait almost 50 years...from the day in 1959 you read this mind-altering comic book that set you on the road to a science career. Thanks to those wonderful GILBERT SCIENCE SETS, you're now standing on the stage accepting your NOBEL PRIZE IN SCIENCE! And what of those City High guys? They're sitting in their La-Z-Boy loungers getting fatter every day watching sports on TV. It took a long time, but you--and your fabulous GILBERT SCIENCE SETS--you showed 'em!